"Toute méchanceté vient de faiblesse." - Rousseau
unite us as lovers
December Playlist, starting and ending with Devendra Banhart. (Of course. He's sexy. See pic above, found on his Last.fm page.) Some songs are old and some are new. Enjoy reading and make your own if you wish!
- Last Song For B - Devendra Banhart
- Baltimore Blues No. 1 - Deer Tick
- Hen Of The Woods - The Cave Singers
- Start A War - The National
- There's A Willow - Hope Sandoval & The Warm Inventions
- (Don't Tremble) - The Low Anthem
- I'll Be On The Water - Akron/Family
- Fearless - Pink Floyd
- I Can See The Pines Are Dancing - A. A. Bondy
- Vampire - Pink Mountaintops
- Maundering - Bonnie 'Prince' Billy
- Prehensile Dream - The Bad Plus
- Fifteen Minutes Old - Snow Patrol
- Lullabye - Grizzly Bear
- Lay Me Down ft. Glen Hansard - Damien Rice
- California -Semisonic
- With Arms Outstretched - Rilo Kiley
- Piazza, New York Catcher - Belle & Sebastian
- Some Things Last A Long Time - Beach House
- Rats - Devendra Banhart
vivere senza rimpianti
Here's the thing. I left Iowa to get away from being caged all the time. Little did I know that Maryland would be 100x worse. It has snowed almost 2 feet in less than a day and the entire city is shut down. No one can go anywhere. Darlene is sleeping at the hospital. All of my friends are in hibernation. (Probably together.) Goddammit.
Enough about that. More about the LDR. (By LDR, I really mean the LD(non)R.) Do you follow? No? Okay, let me put it simply. LDR's do NOT work. By God, don't do it. You hear me? Don't fall for the, "It'll work out this time" or the "I'll try harder." Disclaimer: It is not anyone's fault that it doesn't work out. It's just the fact that two people are wonderful when they're together, and more likely than not, they will not be wonderful when they are not together. No. One's. Fault.
People do not change. Deep down in the bone people are the same as they always were. I will forever believe this.
So what do you do? Listen to songs with harmonica and banjo. Operas or classicals. Carly Simon and Peter Frampton. IcyHot that shit away! Whatever gets the ache to subside.
Personally, (I think) I know what I want in a R. I want art. Which probably doesn't make any sense but it's what I want. Artful spontaneity and faithfulness. I want to move to an apartment and share it with someone. I want to work at a bookstore or coffeeshop. Or a bookstore with a coffeeshop. I want to audition in my spare time. I want to forever keep in touch. Postcards. I want to get lots of postcards in the mail.
Most of all, I want to one day not want anymore. Because realizing that I want so much really sucks.
Side note: I regret so much from this last six months. I wish I could take them all back. Give them back to me, oh mighty keeper of time? Pretty please? I promise I'll re-do them well.
Enough about that. More about the LDR. (By LDR, I really mean the LD(non)R.) Do you follow? No? Okay, let me put it simply. LDR's do NOT work. By God, don't do it. You hear me? Don't fall for the, "It'll work out this time" or the "I'll try harder." Disclaimer: It is not anyone's fault that it doesn't work out. It's just the fact that two people are wonderful when they're together, and more likely than not, they will not be wonderful when they are not together. No. One's. Fault.
People do not change. Deep down in the bone people are the same as they always were. I will forever believe this.
So what do you do? Listen to songs with harmonica and banjo. Operas or classicals. Carly Simon and Peter Frampton. IcyHot that shit away! Whatever gets the ache to subside.
Personally, (I think) I know what I want in a R. I want art. Which probably doesn't make any sense but it's what I want. Artful spontaneity and faithfulness. I want to move to an apartment and share it with someone. I want to work at a bookstore or coffeeshop. Or a bookstore with a coffeeshop. I want to audition in my spare time. I want to forever keep in touch. Postcards. I want to get lots of postcards in the mail.
Most of all, I want to one day not want anymore. Because realizing that I want so much really sucks.
Side note: I regret so much from this last six months. I wish I could take them all back. Give them back to me, oh mighty keeper of time? Pretty please? I promise I'll re-do them well.
I also wish I could tell you more...that I could say all of the things that are in my head. Like, "I do think you're attractive" and, "I dream about dancing with you at a nice dinner party. We both wear gray."
Vivere senza rimpianti my ass.
Vivere senza rimpianti my ass.
peter frampton
My house is cold. The kind of cold that makes ghosts hunker down together for body heat. The cold that doesn't belong inside.
But it's here and unlike the ghosts, I have no one to be close to.
But it's here and unlike the ghosts, I have no one to be close to.
brambles
I don't know why, but I am only able to write on this when I'm home. I suppose it's because I relate the two together - I started writing here so I may as well finish writing here. Not that I will finish. Can blogs be finished? They're not like poems or short fiction (which are never really finished either, just published). Anyway(s).
If you didn't figure it out, I'm home. In Baltimore! It's rather nice. I don't remember the last time I saw consecutive hours of sunshine. It's not cold but it is windy, which isn't pleasant.
Things I haven't been missing:
If you didn't figure it out, I'm home. In Baltimore! It's rather nice. I don't remember the last time I saw consecutive hours of sunshine. It's not cold but it is windy, which isn't pleasant.
Things I haven't been missing:
- The house. This is in utter shambles. Still.
- My room. It's small and now filled with plants. Ferns, trees and a cactus garden.
- Narrow and busy streets at all hours. Having to drive everywhere.
- Having dishes to wash.
- Darlene sending me on random errands.
- Being alone during the day.
Things I have been missing:
- My new(ish) bed. It's soft and has wheels which I can't explain.
- Bastet and Sheba the kittens. Even though they may have flees. I don't want to know, really.
- As much as I hate being out on the streets, I do appreciate the light and noise. It's constant and puts me to sleep.
- Making my own food. Sandwiches, potatoes with cheese, chipped beef gravy. Down-home stuff.
- My crazy ass friends, all of whom are inappropriate in every way and rude.
- Darlene, even though she is equally as insane. It's amazing how much more you love your mother after you graduate from high school.
I am missing other things. Like you and him and them. To say much more would be bitter but omission is betrayal and god forbid there was much more of that.
To bed? Probably not. I guess I'll continue reading Stephen King's Cell. That's the kind of person I am these days. A Stephen King person, whatever that means.
