twelve left

An indie folk-rock band from Portland, Horse Feathers is perfect for this cold windy day. The album Words Are Dead is cleverly heartbreaking with experimental stringed-instrument riffs. Imagine a violin in a cold stream. Babbling. Next to an abandoned chapel. Which is also an acoustic guitar. Also, note the beautiful cover art! Favorite tracks: "Finch On Saturday" and "Falling Through The Roof."

In more recent news, I got a wonderful pair of suede boots from the thrift store for three dollars. They're a wonderful shade of red-brown and perfect for tramping.

hear them talkin' bout me

That last post was a little much.

In other news, people are literally going crazy on the streets. Driving around today was pure chaos. If I never have to go grocery shopping again, I will be a very happy woman.

And, I've been listening to a lot of new music that I think I should make mention of. My album of the day is Welcome Joy by The Cave Singers. This band's from Seattle, made up of old Pretty Girls Make Graves members, and is whimsical. Favorite tracks are "Hen Of the Woods" and "Beach House." Absolutely beautiful collection of music. Think warm hardwood floors and rusty spokes on a bike covered in ivy. You fix up that bike, sir. You ride it.

dote

Another Justin Vernon collaboration, Volcano Choir is stunning. The album Unmap is 35.2 minutes of experimental ambiance. Think burnt lace and coniferous.

Halfway through myself, I find that I can do nothing except listen and wish I was at a cabin on Deep Creek Lake. Or maybe in the bed of a moving pickup.

when i lived alone

I think Justin Vernon and I would be very good friends. He could sing and play guitar to me, make me mimosa and let me scratch his head.

On another note, shoveling. The shoveling that I cannot do because I have no idea where the snow shovel is. I contemplated using a normal shovel and came to the quick conclusion that it was a stupid idea. And - I brought out The Boots. Why did I do such? Because of The Snow. I'm sure you understand.

Anyways.

unite us as lovers

December Playlist, starting and ending with Devendra Banhart. (Of course. He's sexy. See pic above, found on his Last.fm page.) Some songs are old and some are new. Enjoy reading and make your own if you wish!

1. Last Song For B - Devendra Banhart
2. Baltimore Blues No. 1 - Deer Tick
3. Hen Of The Woods - The Cave Singers
4. Start A War - The National
5. There's A Willow - Hope Sandoval & The Warm Inventions
6. (Don't Tremble) - The Low Anthem
7. I'll Be On The Water - Akron/Family
8. Fearless - Pink Floyd
9. I Can See The Pines Are Dancing - A. A. Bondy
10. Vampire - Pink Mountaintops
11. Maundering - Bonnie 'Prince' Billy
12. Prehensile Dream - The Bad Plus
13. Fifteen Minutes Old - Snow Patrol
14. Lullabye - Grizzly Bear
15. Lay Me Down ft. Glen Hansard - Damien Rice
16. California -Semisonic
17. With Arms Outstretched - Rilo Kiley
18. Piazza, New York Catcher - Belle & Sebastian
19. Some Things Last A Long Time - Beach House
20. Rats - Devendra Banhart

vivere senza rimpianti

Here's the thing. I left Iowa to get away from being caged all the time. Little did I know that Maryland would be 100x worse. It has snowed almost 2 feet in less than a day and the entire city is shut down. No one can go anywhere. Darlene is sleeping at the hospital. All of my friends are in hibernation. (Probably together.) Goddammit.

Enough about that. More about the LDR. (By LDR, I really mean the LD(non)R.) Do you follow? No? Okay, let me put it simply. LDR's do NOT work. By God, don't do it. You hear me? Don't fall for the, "It'll work out this time" or the "I'll try harder." Disclaimer: It is not anyone's fault that it doesn't work out. It's just the fact that two people are wonderful when they're together, and more likely than not, they will not be wonderful when they are not together. No. One's. Fault.

People do not change. Deep down in the bone people are the same as they always were. I will forever believe this.

So what do you do? Listen to songs with harmonica and banjo. Operas or classicals. Carly Simon and Peter Frampton. IcyHot that shit away! Whatever gets the ache to subside.

Personally, (I think) I know what I want in a R. I want art. Which probably doesn't make any sense but it's what I want. Artful spontaneity and faithfulness. I want to move to an apartment and share it with someone. I want to work at a bookstore or coffeeshop. Or a bookstore with a coffeeshop. I want to audition in my spare time. I want to forever keep in touch. Postcards. I want to get lots of postcards in the mail.

Most of all, I want to one day not want anymore. Because realizing that I want so much really sucks.

Side note: I regret so much from this last six months. I wish I could take them all back. Give them back to me, oh mighty keeper of time? Pretty please? I promise I'll re-do them well.

I also wish I could tell you more...that I could say all of the things that are in my head. Like, "I do think you're attractive" and, "I dream about dancing with you at a nice dinner party. We both wear gray."

Vivere senza rimpianti my ass.

peter frampton

My house is cold. The kind of cold that makes ghosts hunker down together for body heat. The cold that doesn't belong inside.

But it's here and unlike the ghosts, I have no one to be close to.

I have too much music.

winter break

I would very much like to stay in a bed and breakfast in Winnipeg, Manitoba. Why?

Slurpee capital of the world. Winnipeg Bear (Winnie-the-Pooh.) Neil Young, The Weakerthans and The Wailin' Jennys. Residents of Winnipeg are called Winnipeggers.

That's all I need to say.

you are so sweet dancing

There are many things happening in the next (that have happened in the past) few days. Kate turned twenty-one yesterday. Famous people died today. Kate's party is tomorrow. I'm home alone all weekend while my sisters are playing lax in New Jersey (ew). Doug turns twenty-one on the twenty-eighth. I work from 12:00 until 8:00 on Saturday at the recreation center. I have to drive the truck which is causing anxiety. The dog is sick so I have to make sure it doesn't die on my watch. Camp starts on Monday. My twenty-first birthday is on Tuesday. I'm celebrating on the Fourth of July. I'm not sure which drink to order first. I guess my life is pretty random these days.

I took some pictures today.

I am hoping that I can find a crochet needle soon because I have so much yarn here in my room just calling for me. I'm also hoping that it rains because it's far too hot in my house. If it rains, I'll open all of our windows and doors and try to blow all the hot air out and replace it with cool air. Maybe then I would be able to go to sleep at a decent hour. I guess I should also lay off the Mountain Dew. I think it's making my nerves bad. Or my hands jittery. I've also been drinking a ton of water...which I've heard is a good thing. On July 7th, Ani DiFranco is playing at Rams Head Live! and I'm really hoping that Kate will be able to get off of work that day to go with me because I've heard that Ani is amazing live. I would hate to have to go alone, but I would do it if I had to.

I like waking up early to bid good days at work to people. I also like random letters of desperation to people that I've never met. However, I don't like walking miles in the heat to the nearest mailbox to mail said letters. I think I need to do some more reading on poetry. I haven't been up to writing much besides these blog entries and a few random beginnings of stories. I'm currently listening to the new Regina Spektor cd entitled Far. It's pretty much exactly what I expected, which I suppose is neither a good nor bad thing. I do love Hombre Lobo by Eels, though. It's decent.

I need to buy my plane ticket back to Iowa. I think I'm going to go for orientation week and work in the Theatre or in the Library. I would very much like to be a part of Pieces of the Puzzle again. (Let us cross our fingers.)

Counting down the days until you.

these hazards of love never more will trouble us

Which is worse?

Having or not having? Wanting or not wanting? Knowing or not knowing?

i'm nobody without you, buddy

85. The cure to the blues is a box of Franzia before going to watch a band you don't care for play a lovely set of songs you don't know. (With friends, of course.)

I'm being sincere.

We All End In The Ocean

Things to do in the days up-coming:

1. Hunt for more great music.
2. Go grocery shopping for fruit and juice.
3. Finish cleaning out the guest room. Make the futon.
4. Put away books and sweaters.
5. Prepare my mom's room for post-surgery recuperation.
6. Take and pass driver's test.
7. Get directions to the airport to pick up John.
8. Go downtown, my dad's, D.C., the mall and the park.
9. Sleep less.
10. See friends.